I stumbled upon the following quote:
“It is easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult. Choose your words wisely.”
I believe there are two things that we can never get back, our time and the words we choose.
How often do we throw shade at others, regret it, and realize that we can’t take it back? The damage has been done. And beating ourselves up about it won’t help. The only thing that can help is to become aware of the words we choose to say to others. And ensure we are impeccable with our word.
Don Miquel Ruiz, wrote this amazing book called The Four Agreements. The First Agreement is to be impeccable with your word. It states, “Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.” Now granted this agreement to be impeccable with your word is easier said than done. And for some, including myself, it’s difficult to change behaviour overnight. It does take some time. Becoming aware along with the willingness to want to change is the first step.
I disagree with the first part of the quote, “It is easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult.” There is a story in The Four Agreements, where a little girl with a beautiful voice which constantly loved to sing. One day, her mother came home from a terrible day and had a horrible headache. The little girl was singing out loud as she usually does. The mother was annoyed, and her headache was getting worse. The mother yelled for her to stop, told her she had an ugly voice, and that she should not be singing at all. From that day on the little girl never sang again. In this story, the little girl was so negatively impacted by her mother’s harmful words. The little girl started to believe that she had an ugly voice and that she should never sing again. She was never repaired. We need to be aware because we never really know what affect our words may have on people and how long it may scar them.
I believe we are the most hurtful and critical with the words we choose to say to ourselves. How many times do we say to ourselves without realizing it, I’M STUPID, I’M A FAILURE, I’M UGLY, I’M FAT, I’M UNWORTHY, I’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH. The list goes on and on. Let’s flip the script. Let’s use words of encouragement, kindness, love, and compassion to our self and others. Only then can we start to be impeccable with our word.